Dear Readers

Welcome to the October 2004 issue of the email newsletter.

This month:

• SSEHV Used in Crime Prevention
  

• Half Term Values Alive Event in Croydon

• Training Update: Latest dates plus comments from a recent Croydon Group:




• Values Story : Full Circle - Part Two (continued from September newsletter)
  

If you have any feedback about this newsletter, or if you'd like to share your experiences of SSEHV, please write to us.

Kind Regards,
The Newsletter Team

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SSEHV Used in Crime Prevention

In recent years, Oldham has been one of the areas in the UK with the most SSEHV events and activities. This is having a consistently positive effect on the lives of people within the local community, with the result that more and more local community groups are requesting that SSEHV activities be offered to their clients and members.

The latest such group is a Family Support project known as On Track Crime Prevention Initiative which works with at risk children on housing estates with high crime levels. Sheila Swift and Barbara Edmondson will be running a one-day Values Alive Event on a particular estate for a small group of children with a range of difficulties, all of whom have been selected by the On Track team as likely to benefit most from SSEHV. The one day event will be followed up by a series of after-school Values Alive Clubs, running for at least four weeks.

Barbara writes, "We are hoping some of the On Track staff will do the SSEHV Foundation Course so that they themselves can carry on using the programme, then we can move on to another area. This would be ideal, to get as many areas as possible to use SSEHV."

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Half Term Values Alive Event in Croydon

18 children attended a Values Alive Event in a Croydon school, which ran from 25th to 29th October.

It's organiser, Bina Valsan, writes, "The Event was very successful in many ways. Children began to bring out their innate goodness and became more helpful and considerate as well as disciplined. We had a 'good behaviour' scoring system that was presented to them on power point. Lessons included Drama, Martial Arts, Sport, Singing and Art and Craft work. This gave variety and enriched the quality of the values we taught. Each day began with a Power Point presentation and a role play, followed by a silent sitting exercise, theme for the day and then the main lessons mentioned above. Our volunteers ranged from local people to people who travelled all the way from East and North London, and places as far as Coventry and Shropshire. Our youngest volunteer was eighteen.

"We had the most challenging event as there were a few girls with serious problems and issues that they found difficult to handle, and while these same girls displayed exceptional qualities during numerous occasions in the event, there were times when they needed personal attention and love that we as volunteers gave. These girls took up a lot of the time and we were fortunate enough to have enough volunteers to deal with these situations. All the parents could see that it was a valuable programme we were implementing. One parent said she thought this event should occur many times a year. All the children enjoyed every aspect of it and had only positive things to say.

"On the last day the children gave performances and then they got up one by one to thank us for giving them our time and making it so enjoyable. What was striking was that some children from last year had joined us and remembered the values, the tree symbol and its fruits, the related values and even the Power Point pictures we had used last year, so it is clear that SSEHV remains in the child's memory for a long time."

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Training Update

The Croydon Training Group

Nine people attended a two day SSEHV Parenting Workshop held in Croydon on 2nd and 9th October. Everyone enjoyed the experience and found it to be very beneficial. Comments from participants included:

"The whole programme was very beneficial. I am encouraged to bring along with me more parents."

"I'll encourage the rest of my family to attend the course."

"…an opportunity to revise and reconsider some aspects of my relationship with family members in a different light and to adjust to the requirements of a good parent."

Roger Slawson, one of the workshop participants, writes, "Although I have attended an [SSEHV] teacher training course and expected much the same, how wrong I was. What I was hoping for was help in communicating with children in SSEHV. This course gave me a whole new toolbox full of tools for communicating, nurturing, bringing out the best in, and building relationships with children. Having said that, I do not have children but the same can be applied equally to all relationships, family, friends and work colleagues alike.

Others attending the course represented quite a cross-section and our conclusions were similar. All agreed this was time well spent and would immeasurably improve the quality of their lives and relationships. We have much to change and practice. Thank you Pamela and Ann for sharing your invaluable knowledge."

Other forthcoming SSEHV courses are:

SSEHV Parenting Workshop, Eastbourne, Sussex
Tuesday 2nd November
Tuesday 9th November
Tuesday 16th November
Tuesday 23rd November
Tuesday 30th November
Thursday 2nd December
For more information or to reserve a place, contact Nicola Hague (01323 469321)

Half Day SSEHV INSET for professional teachers, Coventry
Thursday November 4th, 1.00-4.00pm
For more information or to reserve a place, contact Prabha Govindji (024 76440996)

SSEHV Intensive Foundation Course, Pinner, Middlesex
Tuesday 28th December - Module 1
Wednesday 29th December - Module 2
Thursday 30th December - Module 3
Friday 31st December - Module 4
Saturday 1st January 2005 - Module 5
Sunday 2nd January - Module 6
For more information or to reserve a place, contact Pamela Nash (01784 244494)

SSEHV Parenting Workshop, Portsmouth, Hants
Wednesday 19th January 2005, 6.30-9.30pm
Wednesday 26th January
Wednesday 2nd February
Wednesday 9th February
Wednesday 16th February
Wednesday 23rd February
Wednesday 1st March
For more information or to reserve a place, contact Juliet Bell (02392 824892)

If there is no course scheduled in your area but you would like there to be one, we can arrange one as long as there are a minimum of ten people who would like to attend. Please contact Pamela Nash for more information.

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STORY

Full Circle - Part Two (continued from September newsletter)

Eventually, Peter grew up and left home to make his own way in the world. He got married and bought a house not far away, and came home frequently for visits with his young wife. But as time wore on and he had two children of his own, and a demanding job and in-laws that also wanted to spend time with them, the visits fell back to once a month.

There came a very sad year when first Mr Siddlethwaite, and then John Batley passed away. Mr Siddlethwaite was in his eighties, and it was a peaceful death, which happened while he slept. But John was only sixty, and was at work when his weak heart finally gave up trying. Eva and Peter comforted themselves with the thought that although his heart problem had eventually ended his life, in a way it might have actually saved it during the war by keeping him out of danger, thereby giving them all an extra twenty five years together.

Mr Siddlethwaite's flat was sold by the landlord and a new couple moved in downstairs from Eva. They stripped out all the old cupboards and bricked up the fire places. They replaced the old sash windows with double glazing and installed central heating. They were always polite to Eva and said "Hello" when they saw her, but they didn't want to get to know her. They didn't care that Peter had been born in their front bedroom, or that the modern primary school across the road had once been a row of Victorian cottages where several families had lived. They never knew there was an old air raid shelter underneath the flowerbeds in the park at the end of the road, and they didn't notice that Eva came downstairs less and less because she just didn't seem to have the breath to climb back up them again.

Eva passed the time at her upstairs front window, watching the school children coming and going and remembering how the street had looked when she and John had first moved there. She looked forward to the visits from Peter and his family. As time passed, her grandchildren also grew up and had children of their own, and she felt lucky to be blessed with three generations of people that loved her as much as she loved them. But she still missed John. Even though it was thirty years or more since he died, she still felt his presence in the flat, and at times she felt as if he had just stepped out of the room for a moment and expected to see him walk back through the door at any second. During the week she didn't have many visitors, so she had a lot of time to spend alone with her memories.

One day a "For Sale" sign went up outside the downstairs flat, and within two months the couple moved out and a new couple moved in. On the day they arrived they knocked on Eva's door and introduced themselves as Sylvia and Bob. They stayed a while and got talking. Eva made them tea as they hadn't yet had a chance to unpack their things and they were tired and thirsty from the move. They were curious about how different Mrs Batley's flat looked to their own new home. While their flat was sparse and modern, hers was very old fashioned, looking as if nothing had changed since it was built, apart from the occasional lick of paint. So Eva told them all about how their flat had used to look, describing the fire places and the cosy old cupboards. She told them how she and her family had lived in it for so many years, and how she had even given birth in their front bedroom. She described the street as it had looked before the war, and told them about the night when the bomb had knocked down half the houses. They listened, enthralled, trying to picture everything as it had been, and to imagine what it must have felt like to witness such dramatic events and changes.

Sylvia and Bob settled into their new home, and they kept an eye out for Mrs Batley. They popped up to see her often, to make sure she wasn't feeling lonely, and to see if she needed anything from the shops. Sometimes they fetched her prescriptions from the chemist for her, or posted her letters. Eva gave them a key to her door so that they could let themselves in without her having to come down the stairs to open the door. They got to know each other well, and they also became acquainted with Peter and his wife, and Eva's grandchildren and great-grandchildren.

One day Sylvia came up to see Eva in a state of some excitement. She was clutching in her hand an ancient-looking envelope. The paper was yellowing and had a kind of softness to it that expressed its great age. She held it to her chest, and began talking rapidly. It was clear that what she wanted to say had to do with the envelope, but she wanted to tell her story before showing it to Mrs Batley.

"You know my great aunt Annie died a few weeks ago?" she panted. "Well I've been sorting out her house and going through her papers. I found this letter. It was sent to my grandmother and her husband in September 1944. It's from a little boy called Peter. Peter Batley, your son Peter! It's in an envelope addressed to you and Mr Batley, at this address! You knew my grandmother! She stayed with you in this house!"

Eva looked momentarily baffled, then her face lit up. "The Gilberts, you mean?"

"Yes," cried Sylvia. "Gilbert was her married name at the time. Her first husband was killed in the war in 1945. She remarried about five years later, and that was to my grandfather. They both died long before I was born. I knew that grandmother's house had been bombed during the war, but I never knew it was in this street!"

The two women fell silent, looking at each other open mouthed while the information sank in. For Eva, it was news of a long-lost friend, who she just now found out was long since dead. For Sylvia, a connection with the grandmother she never had the chance to know. Together they read and re-read Peter's letter, and then, hugging each other, both started to cry.

Questions

1. Why do you think Peter's letter was never thrown away?

2. Why do you think the couple that moved in after Mr Siddlethwaite died weren't interested in getting to know Mrs Batley?

3. Why do you think Sylvia and Bob were interested?

4. Why do you think this story is called 'Full Circle'?
Can you think of a better title?

5. How did you feel when you heard the story?

6. Does the story remind you of anything in your own life?

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